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Alice's Adventures in Wonderland
Chapter 10. The Lobster Quadrille
The Mock Turtle gave a deep sigh and wiped one flipper across his eyes.
He looked at Alice and tried to speak, but for a minute or two sobs stopped his voice.
"Same as if he had a bone in his throat," said the Gryphon, and it began to shake him and to hit him on the back.
At last the Mock Turtle found his voice, and with tears on his cheeks he went on again.
"You may not have lived much under the sea, " "I haven't," said Alice.
", and maybe you were never even shown a lobster, " Alice began to say "I once tasted, " but stopped herself quickly and said "No, never."
", so you can have no idea what a lovely thing a Lobster Quadrille is!"
"No, indeed," said Alice.
"What kind of a dance is it?"
"Why," said the Gryphon, "you first form a line along the sea shore, "
"Two lines!" cried the Mock Turtle.
"Seals, turtles, salmon, and so on, then when you push all the jellyfish out of the way, "
"That often takes some time," said the Gryphon.
", you move forward twice, "
"Each with a lobster as a partner!" cried the Gryphon.
"Of course," the Mock Turtle said.
"Move forward twice, join your partners, "
", change lobsters, and move back in the same order," said the Gryphon.
"Then, you know," the Mock Turtle went on, "you throw the, "
"The lobsters!" shouted the Gryphon, leaping into the air.
", as far out to sea as you can, "
"Swim after them!" screamed the Gryphon.
"Turn a somersault in the sea!" cried the Mock Turtle, dancing about.
"Change lobsters again!" yelled the Gryphon very loud.
"Back to land again, and that's all the first figure," said the Mock Turtle, dropping his voice suddenly.
The two creatures, who had been jumping about like wild things, sat down again very sadly and quietly and looked at Alice.
"It must be a very pretty dance," said Alice in a quiet voice.
"Would you like to see a little of it?" said the Mock Turtle.
"Very much indeed," said Alice.
"Come, let's try the first figure!" said the Mock Turtle to the Gryphon.
"We can do without lobsters, you know. Which will sing?"
"Oh, you sing," said the Gryphon.
"I've forgotten the words."
They began to dance slowly around Alice, and sometimes they stepped on her toes when too close.
They waved their front paws to mark the time, while the Mock Turtle sang very slowly and sadly.
"Will you walk a little faster?" said a whiting to a snail.
"There's a porpoise close behind us and he's treading on my tail".
See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all move forward!
They're waiting on the stones, Will you come and join the dance?
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the dance?
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?
"You can really have no idea how lovely it'll be when they take us up and throw us with the lobsters out to sea!"
But the snail said "Too far, too far!" and looked away.
He thanked the whiting kindly, but he wouldn't join the dance.
Wouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't join the dance.
Wouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't, couldn't, couldn't join the dance.
"What does it matter how far we go?" his scaly friend replied.
"There's another shore, you know, on the other side."
"The further off from England the nearer to France."
"So don't be pale, dear snail, but come and join the dance."
"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the dance?"
"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the dance?"
"Thank you, it's a very nice dance to watch," said Alice, feeling very glad it was over at last.
"And I do so like that strange song about the whiting!"
"Oh, about the whiting," said the Mock Turtle, "they, you have seen them, of course?"
"Yes," said Alice, "I've often seen them at dinn, " she stopped herself quickly.
"I don't know where Dinn may be," said the Mock Turtle.
"But if you have seen them so often, of course you know what they're like."
"I think so," Alice answered, thinking.
"They have their tails in their mouths and they're all covered in crumbs."
"You're wrong about the crumbs," said the Mock Turtle.
"Crumbs would all wash off in the sea."
"But they have their tails in their mouths, and the reason is," Here the Mock Turtle yawned and shut his eyes.
". Tell her the reason and all that," he said to the Gryphon.
"The reason is," said the Gryphon.
"That they went with the lobsters to the dance and so were thrown out to sea and had to fall a long way."
"So they got their tails fast in their mouths and could not get them out again, that's all."
"Thank you," said Alice, "it's very interesting. I never knew so much about a whiting before."
"I can tell you more than that, if you like," said the Gryphon.
"Do you know why it's called a whiting?"
"I never thought about it," said Alice.
"Why?"
"It does the boots and shoes," the Gryphon said in a very serious voice.
Alice was very puzzled and sat silent, staring at them with a blank face.
"Does the boots and shoes!" she repeated in a wondering tone.
"Why, what are your shoes made with?" said the Gryphon.
"I mean, what makes them so shiny?"
Alice looked at them and thought a little before she answered.
"They're polished with blacking, I think."
"Boots and shoes under the sea," the Gryphon went on in a deep voice, "are polished with a whiting. Now you know."
"And what are they made of?" Alice asked, very curious.
"Soles and eels, of course," the Gryphon answered a bit impatient.
"Any shrimp could have told you that."
"If I had been the whiting," said Alice, still thinking of the song.
"I'd have said to the porpoise, 'Keep back please. We don't want you with us.'"
"They had to have him with them," the Mock Turtle said.
"No wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise."
"Wouldn't it really?" said Alice with great surprise.
"Of course not," said the Mock Turtle.
"Why, if a fish came to me and said he was going on a journey, I'd say 'With what porpoise?'"
"Do you mean 'purpose'?" said Alice.
"I mean what I say," the Mock Turtle answered in a hurt tone.
And the Gryphon added, "Come, let's hear some of your adventures."
"I could tell you my adventures from this morning," said Alice a little shyly.
"But it's no use going back to yesterday because I was a different person then."
"Explain all that," said the Mock Turtle.
"No, no. The adventures first," said the Gryphon in an impatient voice.
"Explanations take such a long time."
So Alice began to tell them her adventures from the time she first saw the White Rabbit.
She felt a little nervous at first because the two creatures sat very close to her.
They sat one on each side and opened their eyes and mouths very wide.
She got braver as she went on.
Her listeners were very quiet until she came to the part about her repeating "You're old, Father William"
To the Caterpillar and the words all coming different.
Then the Mock Turtle took a long breath and said "That's very curious."
"It's as curious as it can be," said the Gryphon.
"It all came different!" the Mock Turtle said, thinking.
"I'd like to hear her try to repeat something now."
"Tell her to begin." He looked at the Gryphon as if he thought it had some kind of power over Alice.
"Stand up and repeat 'Tis the voice of the sluggard,'" said the Gryphon.
"How these creatures order one about and make one repeat lessons!" thought Alice.
"I might as well be at school."
But she stood up and began to repeat it, though her head was full of the Lobster Quadrille.
She hardly knew what she was saying, the words came very odd.
"'Tis the voice of the Lobster."
"I heard him say, 'You have baked me too brown."
"I must sugar my hair.' As a duck with its eyelids so he with his nose Trims his belt and his buttons and turns out his toes."
"That's different from what I used to say when I was a child," said the Gryphon.
"Well, I never heard it before," said the Mock Turtle.
"But it sounds very silly."
Alice said nothing, sitting very still with her hands over her face.
She sat down with her face in her hands, wondering if anything would ever happen in a normal way again.
"I'd like to have it explained," said the Mock Turtle.
"She can't explain it," said the Gryphon quickly.
"Go on with the next verse."
"But about his toes?" the Mock Turtle kept on.
"How could he turn them out with his nose, you know?"
"It's the first position in dancing," Alice said, but she was very puzzled by the whole thing and wanted to change the subject.
"Go on with the next verse," the Gryphon said again, impatient.
"It begins 'I passed by his garden.'"
Alice didn't dare to say no, though she felt sure it would go wrong.
And she went on in a shaking voice.
"I passed by his garden and saw with one eye How the Owl and the Panther were sharing a pie."
"What's the use of repeating all that stuff,"
The Mock Turtle said, "if you don't explain it as you go on? It's the most confusing thing I ever heard!".
"Yes, I think you should stop," said the Gryphon, and Alice was very glad to do so.
"Shall we try another figure of the Lobster Quadrille?" the Gryphon asked.
"Or would you like the Mock Turtle to sing a song?"
"Oh, a song please, if the Mock Turtle will be so kind,"
"Alice said this eager, the Gryphon, offended, said, "Hm. No accounting for tastes. Sing her 'Turtle Soup,' will you, old fellow?
The Mock Turtle gave a deep sigh and began, with his voice sometimes full of sobs, to sing this.
Beautiful Soup so rich and green waiting in a hot tureen.
Who for such dainties wouldn't stoop?
Soup of the evening beautiful Soup.
Soup of the evening beautiful Soup.
Beau oo tiful Soo oop Beau oo tiful Soo oop.
Soo oop of the e e evening Beautiful beautiful Soup.
Beautiful Soup, Who cares for fish, game, or any other dish?
Who wouldn't give all else for two pennyworth only of beautiful Soup?
Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup, Beau-oo-tiful Soo-oop.
Beau-oo-tiful Soo-oop, Soo-oop of the e-e-evening, Beautiful, beauti-FUL SOUP.
"Chorus again!" cried the Gryphon, and the Mock Turtle had just begun to sing it again when a cry of.
"The trial is beginning!" was heard far off.
"Come on!" cried the Gryphon, and taking Alice by the hand it hurried away without waiting for the end of the song.
"What trial is it?"
Alice gasped as she ran, but the Gryphon said "Come on!" and ran faster, the sad words came more faint.
"Soo oop of the e e evening Beautiful beautiful Soup!"